And every breath you take is painful.
Anxiety creeps and you do your best to swallow it down.
Tightness builds in your chest and you shut your eyes in an attempt to relax.
You don’t want to panic. You can’t deal with that mess right now.
So you breathe, meditate, focus on positive, sleepy thoughts.
But you are so far from sleep.
The clouds outside the window are quickly passing over the moon, night seems to be ending.
But you look at the clock and see it’s only been a minute or two.
Rest, my soul.
There is peace out there.
Seven days to go.
There comes a time in life where you walk away from drama and all the people who create it.
Surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good.
Love the people who treat you right.
Pray for the ones who don’t.
Life is too short to be anything other than happy.
Falling down is a part of life.
Getting back up is living.
Sometimes you just have to stop, breathe, and walk away.
The Myths about Abusers
- He was abused as a child, and he needs therapy for it.
For some abusive men, the blame-the-childhood approach has an additional reason for being appealing: By focusing on what his mother did wrong, he gets to blame a woman for his mistreatment of women. This explanation can also appeal to the abused woman herself, since it makes sense out of his behavior and gives her someone safe to be angry at—since getting angry at him always seems to blow up in her face.
An abusive man may embellish his childhood suffering once he discovers that it helps escape responsibility. The National District Attorney’s Association Bulletin reported a revealing study that was conducted on another group of destructive men: child sexual abusers. The research asked each man whether he himself had been sexually victimized as a child.
A hefty 67 percent of the subjects said yes. However, the researcher then informed the men that he was going to hook them up to a lie-detector test and ask them the same questions again. Affirmative answers suddenly dropped to only 29 percent. In other words, abusers of all varieties tend to realize the mileage they can get out of saying, “I’m abusive because the same thing was done to me.”
An abusive man is not unable to resolve conflicts nonabusively; he is unwilling to do so… Abusers have normal abilities in conflict resolution, communication and assertiveness when they choose to use them. They typically get through tense situations at work without threatening anyone; they manage their stress without exploding when they spend Thanksgiving with their parents; they share openly with their siblings regarding their sadness over a grandparent’s death. But they don’t want to handle these kinds of issues nonabusively when it involves their partner.
You can equip an abuser with the most innovative, new age skills for expressing his deep emotions, listening actively, and using win-win bargaining, and then he will go home and continue abusing.
Word…. Lessons i have had to learn.